I've never felt such an emptiness over another person before. This aching to see them, talk to them, touch them. I think being here on my family vacation and being the only one who DOESN'T have a family amplifies that loneliness. All the dreams he talked about and I listened to, are happening without me being involved. Because he doesn't want me with him.
This curse of emotion dominates my thoughts and actions. If I don't follow my emotions it feels like I am swimming upstream, going against nature. But, if I follow my heart and "react" I constantly run the risk of getting my heart obliterated, over and over again. I honestly don't know what to do anymore. I just want to quit hurting.....
I hurt for you, Tracy. And I understand. I wish I had the magic words to make the hurt go away...but until it does, and after it does, and ALWAYS, I'll be right here beside you.
ReplyDelete(And, by the way, you DO have a family, and we love you very much.)
Thank you. And thank you for listening to my incessant talking, longing and obsessing. If I didn't have you to talk about this with, I would go crazy. Thank you for helping me keep a little sanity (which I know is questionable at times. LOL)
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